Sep. 28th, 2009

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I've been kind of invisible for a while. Usually I lurk around a lot, but lately I'm not even checking email and LJ regularly which is... unlike me. I don't know quite why. Anyhow, if anyone on my list has been feeling ignored... a lot of apologies. I just haven't been here.

My mom is still crazy but we managed to get things straightened out. She finally got some chemo so I'm waiting on the upswing and really, it can't come soon enough. She's incredibly spend-happy at the moment which is such a bad idea, but I can't really do much beyond express my opinion of it... it's not my money. I just... wish she was more practical, more reachable, more... normal. And that's not fair of me because she won't be, and knowing that she's only ever going to get worse and never completely better is hard on both of us. Still, I am expecting a reprieve of the worst of it, at least for a while, and that's something to be thankful for... a lot of people don't even get that.

Disneyland was wonderful. Alex is in Kindergarten... didn't like it at first but is settling in and I hope it'll be a good year for him. We also (finally) got him started in swim lessons, so that's fun. Ryan is recovering from a cold so has been a little extra clingy/fussy lately, but is still adorable and growing like some baby-shaped strain of kudzu, and has me pretty wrapped around his slobbery little fingers. Nate is wonderful beyond the description of it, but that's pretty much always true and likely no surprise to anyone who knows me. I've been a little depressed and overwhelmed and struggling with self esteem... but working on it, day by day. Halloween is coming, and autumn in general is just the time that feeds my soul, and there are lots of little signs of the season that make me smile. Life's not bad, and I think will get a little easier over the coming month.

Anyhow... I really do love and treasure you all, even if I'm terrible about keeping in touch and showing it.

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sublimatedangel

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